A Most Compelling Tribute

Six (6) airtight, courtroom-grade arguments for why thou — yes thou — should dispatch a tribute unto Brother M.J. Smith forthwith.

Comedy Is A Public Utility

Like the post office, but funnier and slightly less reliable. You wouldn't deny the post office a stamp. Don't deny a brother a $5.

II.

Have you priced lean protein lately? Chicken thighs are now a luxury good. The Bible did not foresee this.

III.

(It is not. But the joy you feel is, spiritually, a write-off.)

IV.

You give a little. I invest. We both retire. This is just math, beloved.

I have whispered thy name to the All-Seeing Eye. The Eye is now Venmo-aware. Do not test the Eye.

VI.

Imagine telling your grandchildren you funded the man who coined the phrase 'big back recovery.' Legacy. Pure legacy.

Choose thy instrument. Both are blessed.